Month: January 2017

I am raising two wonderful children. They are now one years old and ten years old. I never thought much about how different  their childhood and mine would be when I was pregnant with them. When I was born and the whole time I was growing up it was so different. We had busy parents who worked constantly, but very hard so they could do as many nice things for us and with us as possible. There was no baby proofing when I was a baby we lived in a 3 story home and there were no child gates blocking stairs no outlet covers etc. I did not end up in hospital I was just fine. There was not boards and posts and social media input everywhere of how you should  raise your child. What you should be feeding them buy them for entertainment, clothes etc. When I was in elementary my parents worked a lot and sometimes my mom was late picking me up or even forgot. Now days  shed be scorned for that. But back then no big deal a friends parent would take me home or a yard duty would wait with me until she arrived. I also from third grade on was home alone after I arrived home on the bus. I knew how to make snacks for myself and took care of all my entertainment, school work , chores without  any prompting. I also had so much freedom that came along with that responsibly that my kids will never know at the young age of 7. Back then we were toted around with no car seat even when we were less than 80 pounds. Sometimes with no seat belts in the back bed of trucks  or laying down in back of car. We survived ! Yet today there are so many rules and so much electronics that it’s a whole new world for my children. Some of it is so wonderful. I want them safe as they can be. I want them to have the best advanced technology. But they have  lost the freedom, lost the responsibility and pride that comes with that. They are missing out on being bored and curing it themselves with imagination and creativity. They are forever in social competition to be popular and cool on social media from such a young age. I was a fashion victim  for most of my young life and I read books and played in the dirt. I am sure that since I spent some of my young life being bullied and coming home crying. It would have been extremely  worse on me if I came home and that it was still there on social media. I feel for the children today with all the horrible bullying and terrorizing on social media. I also wish my son and daughter could enjoy a time in their lives of living in the moment not needing to photograph  everything tweet or snap or Facebook it. Social media did not even come into my life until  about a year before my son was born I was nearly  30. I feel so lucky that I did have a time in my young childhood all the way through high school and until I was 21 that the phone was not an appendage to me I was not a slave to it. Also I was able to not be a slave to internet and social media until around 2005 and then even though I still went without it and still at that point in my life went without phones on my vacations. Once I became a mother I started seeing the differences of my childhood and theirs. I do as much as I can to balance the limits with my kids on what they do with electronics how much time they can spend on it etc. I also do my best to make sure they have responsibilities and chores as well as know how to cook or at least help prep meals depending on age. I want them to have some sense of the responsibility and freedoms I grew up with. I was babysitting a 1,3,5-year-old by the time I was 10 and it was late into the night. I was always making money on my own sense then. It gave me a sense of pride and I wanted to do things on my own. I wanted to earn my own way. I had goals from a very young age. I was not pushed towards high grades or college or sports and activities. My parents worked really hard and they were busy and it was left to me to give myself drive and determination and to work hard. I wanted to for myself and to make them proud of me. Now days  I notice kids do not want to work they do not want their own money. They don’t even want to get their driver’s license which I cannot fathom. They have no desire to move out of the house when they graduate. I could not wait I fantasized about having my own place since I was like 10 or 11 and it was something I looked forward  to. Saying that I want to make sure you know I was driven  I had loving wonderful parents who I adored and spent a ton of time with. They worked crazy hours but when we did have weekends together and vacations we made the most of it and I was one lucky kid. I was also responsible enough that from age 14 on I was left at home days or week at a time and was trusted to get myself to school feed myself get school and homework done take care of dogs etc. I did and I loved it, sometimes I wish they were home when it was around my birthday or special event. But otherwise I loved being responsible  and doing a good job and parents coming home to a clean house knowing I followed the rules did not stay out past curfew which was only 8pm or have friends over. My daughter is already  desiring to be on iPad and on phone and she’s not even two. I will do my best to make sure she understands  limits just as my son has been learning. I am very lucky that my son is an amazing older brother who loves his sister with all his heart. I work everyday  to be the best mom I can be. I mess up as we all do from time to time but I try not to be too critical of myself and to just learn improve and carry on. I love being a mom. I would love to hear any of your thoughts  thanks for reading I know time in our busy days is very  precious.