August 24, 2019

So this week we had football scrimmage. Football weigh in that my husband drove in for. We went to a few movies and had some family time.

Got two nights with my hubby home wasn’t enough. We got weeks and sometimes longer without seeing each other so it’s hard to properly connect and fulfill each other’s needs in such short times. Especially while doing all our parenting and work duties in the short span on time too.

Got some girl time with Savannah yesterday while the boys went out of town for football weigh in. It was nice love girl time.

I look forward to our family being under same roof every night hope that happens while we have both kids at home still. I never feel like my love cup of emotionally fulfillment support and intimacy is filled up anymore.

I can’t just do physical and not have a deeper connection. It’s so hard having distance with my husband I love him miss him a lot but it’s been the normal for way too long that he is gone more than he is home with us.

He works really hard for our family and we so love and appreciate him for that but it feels like he puts us on back burner while he is away at work and then when he’s here he still is not all in he’s worried about work etc.

I don’t know how to ensure we connect deeply consistently and take care of each other’s emotional and physical needs with this situation it is so frustrating to me. I’ve had a bad hip/ thigh injury for whole summer haven’t been able to get it fixed.

Makes physical intimacy very painful to point of tears yet I try every time I see my husband and it feels in appreciated and like it’s not enough. Which is very hurtful.

I am just going to concentrate on what I can control time with my kids preparing them for school and activities. Cooking healthy being healthy taking care of me.

I will also do my best to make sure my husband knows how much we love and miss him and appreciate all he does for our family. Hopefully my hip will get fixed as well so I am not in physical pain anymore.

Today Savannah and I enjoyed another nice girl day together. Brandon went to Magic Mountain with his friend for his birthday 🎂 they are not home yet.

Lately my periods have been very irregular spotting that I think is a period then being late or missing my period and then extra heavy I must seriously be at least pre menopause.

I’m going to try to keep dairy out of my diet for awhile and see if my stomach issues improve. Hope everyone had a great weekend! Goodnight 💤

Published by 40fitmom

My Name is Jennifer .I was born and raised in California.I am the proud mother of two incredible children Brandon and Savannah.I enjoy trying new things,Outdoor adventures,new recipes, and travel, just to name a few.I hope to encourage others to try new things! I strive to learn as much as possible. I am on a journey to be my best self. Working out more drinking half my body weight in water. Meditating and journaling to find inner peace. I am working on my self esteem and have lots of goals I’m working towards. I cherish my family and friends and never take a single moment for granted.

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